With the recently completed Soshified Field Trip, many lasting friendships were formed. Along with those friendships come precious memories, laugh-out-loud stories, and some crazy ideas. One of the ideas that was generated amongst myself and fellow Field Trip members ShannonK, MoonSoshi9, julian52, and JadeFalcon was the concept of Soshi Airlines. We were talking amongst ourselves while walking through Incheon International Airport on our final day in Korea, and we thought “if Soshi was the flight crew on our airplane, what would each member’s role be on the plane?” What did our crazy brains come up with? Come on in and find out!
They’d be wearing uniforms like this, of course
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Pilot/co-pilot: Seohyun/Sooyoung
Flying a plane is no joke, and we all wanted somebody at the flight controls with a serious disposition and a strong attention to detail. Our inflexible maknae seemed like the perfect fit, as she’s a natural prodigy who can become well-versed in seemingly everything she tries: singing, piano, guitar, and even tap-dancing! Even if she didn’t already know how to fly a plane (who knows, maybe she does), we have full confidence that she’d be able to learn right away.
As for the critical job of co-pilot, we figured that all things in life need to be in balance, and the role of co-pilot is no different. Rather than have the co-pilot be equally serious and by-the-book as Seohyun, a silly choding-like personality seemed like a more interesting and fun match. Sooyoung might be able to get the inflexible pilot to throw in a couple loops to the flight pattern, just for the amusement of the people riding in the plane. Plus, if any passengers ever complained about main pilot Seohyun’s flying style, it would be easy for co-pilot Sooyoung to squash any complaints with a simple yell of “YAH!”
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Baggage Handler: Yoona
I know that it doesn’t seem like the most glamourous job for the center of Girls’ Generation, but there’s a good reason for this. The girls constantly talk about how Yoona is the strongest member of the group, and they often call her “Him Yoona” in reference to her strength. With that in mind, she’d be able to toss our bags into the plane with ease. Of course, she’d be the special baggage handler that we’d invite onto the plane after she’s finished her job. I’m sure the passengers would all join in and help to massage Yoona’s shoulders after such a strenuous task. You can visit https://tranquilme.com/blog/ to learn more about the benefits of massage therapy.
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The Person With the Glowing Sticks Directing the Plane: Hyoyeon
(Editor’s note: Sorry, I don’t know the specific job title…)
You all know which person I’m talking about, right? The person with those glowing orange sticks that waves them around in some sort of vague pattern that apparently the pilot understands. It seems like such a boring job, but Hyoyeon would make it spicy like only she can. She’d be popping and dancing her directions out like a true dancing queen. And unlike other airlines, there would be a live video feed that would be playing on the video screens inside the plane, so all the passengers would be treated to her charismatic directions. And like Yoona, of course, she’d be invited onto the plane before it actually takes off, so we can hang out with Kim Choding for however many hours the plane is in the air.
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Flight Attendants: Jessica, Sunny, Tiffany, Yuri
Having four or more flight attendants is pretty standard practice on an international flight, so we chose these particular four. Why did we choose these specific four?
Jessica sweet smile and clear, soothing voice makes her seem like a perfect flight attendant. I say “seem”, because after thinking about it further, we actually realized that she would make a terrible flight attendant. Why? Because she would be sleeping in the back of the plane the entire time, and would therefore be unable to ever serve any of the passengers. If she ever managed to wake up, we’d be mashing the call button over and over just to see her, but that’s a very big if.
Sunny would be the flight attendant that would be incredibly sweet to you if you asked for help, but would sternly scold you if you caused her any trouble. She’s always been shown to have a sharp wit and is quick on her feet, so nobody would ever be able pull a fast one on Sunny. Think you’re getting away with that prank you’re trying to pull on your sleeping friend? Not if Sunny’s around. She’ll give you that angry tongue-in-cheek look and the guilt will overwhelm you. But get on her good side, and you’ll be seeing eye-smiles for the entire flight. And Sunny would also be the flight attendant who could calm down any crying babies on the flight. Remember Best Mom Sunny on Hello Baby and how quickly she calmed down the chubby cutie on Invincible Youth? Don’t have to worry about any crying babies on Soshi Airlines as long as Sunny is around.
Have you ever encountered that flight attendant who is just so incredibly friendly to everyone? Meet Tiffany Hwang, everyone. She’ll be the flight attendant walking by asking what meal you’d like to eat as she gives you that killer eye-smile. Even if you’re too distracted by her beauty to answer, she would just laugh sweetly and somehow know exactly what you wanted. And on international flights, Tiffany’s bilingual skills would certainly come in handy. She could help English-speaking tourists and Korean grandmas and grandpas alike with filling out their customs forms. After leaving the plane, you could be sure that everybody would be saying “That flight attendant named Tiffany was so sweet!”
If your luck goes just right, you end up on a plane with that one really hot flight attendant. On Soshi Airlines, that would be Yuri. Her uniform would be mysteriously different from everyone else’s, showing her abs when no one else’s uniform does. Even if she messed up your drink order and gave you apple juice instead of orange juice, you’d never be able to complain. How could you, when she gives you a heart after serving you that drink? We’d leave our Soshi Airlines flight wondering how she never gets in trouble for her ab-friendly uniform, but happy that her bosses never seem to notice.
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In-flight Entertainment: Taeyeon
Boring airlines give you a limited choice of movies to watch. Exciting airlines like Soshi Airlines give you incredible entertainment in the form of Taengoo. Put her on the mic that reaches the entire plane and let her sing, and that’s plenty good enough for us, but she won’t let it stop there. She can sing any style that people want to hear: playful pop songs, emotional ballads, or powerful rocker screams. And anytime she needs a rest from singing, I think simply walking up to her, telling her a joke, and hearing her ahjumma laugh is plenty of entertainment already.
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